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Tuesday, August 25, 2009

potty talk.


i quit.  call me a failure. call me lazy. call me anything you want. but honestly, i don't care. sometimes, kids just aren't ready for potty training - and that's my professional opinion. i honestly thought it would be easy, but obviously those were just delusions of a sleep deprived mother. i was excited, i was looking forward to it, it looked so easy on the dvd. unfortunately, owen didn't share my same zeal for the project. one month later, i'm officially hanging up my potty training hat, at least for now. it's just not worth it. & honestly, i don't mind changing diapers all that much. in the mean time, i think i better come up with a better plan of attack. anyone out there got any suggestions for me?

30 comments:

Beverly said...

How old is he? It could be that he is just not ready. I remember trying so hard to get DS trained before DD came along. We had our good days and bad days. I remember sitting in the chair nursing DD and hearing DS take himself to the potty. YES!!!

DD was another story. She was showing interest in the potty at 18 months. We started and were pretty accomplished (wearing panties on outings and everything!). Then, she got a tummy bug and I put her back in pull-ups. Then, we backslid. I decided to take a break and deal with it after a big event was over. She took right to it. We still have accidents, but she was older and more in charge about it.

Can Dad take the reigns of potty training on his days at home? Boys love to "tinkle" outside. Let dad help him find a tree or bush and have at it. Being "just like Dad" is its own motivation.

Allison said...

We have had great success with all three of ours using the "potty training in one day" method.

They've all been trained in a few days, or in the case of my son, about a week or two. One daughter was 2.5, one was 2, and my son was 2.5.

Let me know if you want the details of what we did. But I do believe they have to be able to communicate clearly and ready. I don't know how old your cutie is.

Alicia said...

I don't care what anyone says, in my opinion, boys, in general, are not ready until they are almost three. Both of my boys were completely potty trained by their third birthday, even if it was only a few days before. The pee was the easy part it was the poo that held them back. Now with #3 I have dreams of him just doing all on his own, sooner than his brothers, but in reality I am a-okay with waiting.

Misty said...

Oh honey! My oldest didn't get COMPLETELY potty trained until he was four! I had a major mommy meltdown and thought I was the worst mother on the face of the Earth! I cried buckets! He just wasn't ready! Every thing turned out fine! Now my second was barely 2! It is really all in the child! Take it from someone who has been through it! RELAX and ENJOY your child! They grown up way too fast to stress! Good luck!

Misty said...

BTW...That picture is cute as a button!!!!! So Stinkin Cute!!!!!!

Christie said...

This is what I did: NOTHING.

I waited until they were ready and asking to go all the time. Then, on came the big boy underwear, and BAM - potty trained. I am constantly amazed by all these people who sit at home for a week, begging, bribing, pleading, and cleaning up messes. No thanks. At about age 2 3/4 to 3, I put them in pull-ups, but didn't do anything really until they started asking for it. It worked for me and was easy.

Amy said...

I SOOO feel your pain. I have an almost three year old who is just not ready. I'm hoping the peer pressure at preschool will help (peer pressure can be good too, right?). As much as I want him out of diapers before baby #2 comes in December I'm not willing to make life miserable for all of us. Guess we'll wait 'til he's showing more interest. Good luck to you! And, know that you are not alone. :)

Poulsen Family said...

My DS was terrible to train..he was the first and the only thing that worked was naked training, let him run around totally naked..never had any messes to clean up and he only had accidents when he wore underwear. Also, for aiming we used cherrios (they were star ships and he used his light saber to sink them). If it's not working, give it a break for a while...he just may not be ready...boys are BUSY they'd rather be playing then attending to their needs.

amylee13 said...

I think there is too much pressure for us parents to get our kids trained. Even our pediatrician, who I love, was encouraging it at our 2 year appointment a year ago. My daughter is just starting to use the potty a handful of times a day. The best thing I did was just wait until she was ready. They are all ready at different times, and only they can let you know when they are ready. Don't stress, you are doing the right thing!

Rebecca is Thrilled by the Thought said...

I'm also doing nothing. My toddler is my first, so I don't know what I'm doing, but it really doesn't seem right to push the issue. When she's ready, I'll start buying pullups and panties. In the meantime, I'm glad I don't have to pull over for potty breaks!

Emily said...

wait!!

Erin said...

oh no! I'm already dreading potty training! Sleep, eating...NOTHING has come easily with our little love, so I can't imagine teaching him to use the potty will be any better. **trying to think happy thoughts!**

OREGON SOUTHWORTHS said...

If you figure out something great, let me know, but for now we are just waiting! My little boy is about 2 1/4 and showing no signs of interest so we are not pushing it until he's ready. I'm just hoping by 3, so we've got a ways.

Also, I'm fairly new to your blog but had to say I loved seeing your wedding pics! My husband and I were also married in the Los Angeles temple (he's a Cali boy - I'm from Oregon) in '05. Other than family, I don't know many people who were married there (due largely to the fact that I grew up in Oregon) so it was neat to see someone else with that temple in the background for their special day!
- Jennifer

i'm kelly said...

thanks for all the encouragement. owen is almost 3. he's birthday is at the end of october. i always thought he'd be so quick... seeing his big brother doing it and all. he'll go pee easy peasy... but #2 we've had no luck. & he just doesn't care. i can put him in unders, he can have an accident & he will run around like it's no big deal. i'm glad to hear i'm not the only one out there!

That potty training in one day method sounds wonderful tough. i like the idea of doing nothing & them hopefully in a couple of months he will be more ready. maybe we will try that then!

emily said...

um, ditto ditto ditto.

am thinking my 2.5 year old will be wearing diapers to college.

Domestic Chicky said...

I will pass on the best parenting advice I ever got-
You can kill yourself spending months or even a year trying to potty train your kids when they aren't ready, or you can train them literally almost overnight when they are. Both of my boys were a little over 3, but it was the easiest thing ever. I just let them know the big boys underwear were ready when they were, and with the exception of a couple of accidents in the beginning when they would get too busy playing to remember to pee, there have been no accidents. I wasn't in any hurry-finding a nearby potty was a lot harder then changing a diaper : )

Shannon said...

i would definitely watch for signs that he is ready... unfortunately, parents are often ready WAY before the little ones! Give it some time and try again when he starts telling you that he is wet/dry (and ask him this often)... when you try again, take 3 ENTIRE days, when you can do nothing but stay at home and train, train, train... sit him on the potty every 30 minutes during this time and congragulate him each time he is dry... do NOT use pull-ups, but only underware! I think it just makes the process that much longer and you might get some dirty undies, but it will be worth it in the end! I've helped to train many, many kids in my profession - not that that is what speech therapists typically do, BUT... when you work with pre-k kids with disabilities, it just comes as part of the territory! :) Above all! HANG IN THERE! And a break is probably a good idea. You don't want it to become a struggle for either of you!

Lene said...

Just wait and relax.
I would much rather change diapers than clean up accidents...and this from a woman that has been changing diapers for 11 years straight and for quite a few of those years I have had 2 kiddos in diapers.

Stacie said...

Well, I say wait until he shows interest, unless he doesn't show it until like 12, that could be awkward..Seriously, as a former Early Childhood educator, a tried and true method we used with boys was Cheerios. Just throw some in and make a game of aiming for them..sounds weird but boys usually love winning and shooting, so it seemed to work. Good luck!

Sew Create It - Jane said...

What great comments...they all say what I would say...wait :o) I'm a mother of 2 girls and both didn't train til their 3rd birthday...but when they did it was an overnight process. I also work in a playgroup with 2-3 year olds and I see it ALL the time..mothers that insist on toilet training too early and we've had some that were wetting themselves daily which isn't fun for anyone. Hang in there...he'll get it soon enough.

Mary's Cottage Quilts said...

Just know that there are not a lot of kids that go to kindergarten in diapers

Sam said...

Its not worth stressing. We waited until ours was ready and then we bribed her to motivate her a bit more and she was set within the week and we haven't had any accidents. Good luck. Have you let him aim for cheerios yet. I hear boys are supposed to love that.

Diana M. said...

Not sure what method you were trying but I used the 3Day Potty Training method on both of my very strong willed daughters and it worked like a charm. I just potty trained my 3 year old about a month or 2 ago and she "got it" within the 1st 2 days. Sounds like a gimmick but it really worked great for us and it has worked for a few other friends that we recommended it to. :)

Beth said...

By opinion, potty training, or potty learning generally sucks. My first child was a nightmare, not poop trained until 3.5. I waited until second daugther and son were 3. PIECE of cake after that. I heard nighmares about boys, but nothing compared to the first. Really,I think Jack was the easiest! If it is getting too stressful and no progress is being made, back off. I know which each additional pack of diaper you throw in the shopping cart, the harder it is to hold off. BUT, sometimes it is way worth it, AND the right thing to do!!!!! Good luck!

kathryn said...

i've put potty training Cash on the back burner as well. i'm with you- i'd rather change a diaper than clean up an accident in a pair of underpants. if you find success, let me know your plan of attack!

Lacey said...

Oh man, just leave it alone for a few months. When he's ready, he will practically do it himself! (Besides, I think it's much easier to take a diapered kid to Costco & Target & out to eat than a newly potty-trained one. I HATE the phase when you're always rushing to the nasty public bathroom!) Just embrace it...diapers can be your friend. =)

Angry Julie Monday said...

Caden was 3.5 when he was completely trained. He was in no hurry to train. We were not in a hurry, but his preschool was.

Mod Podge Amy said...

My brother Kyle was 4 before he happened. He would change his own diapers! The rest of us were 2 - and there are five children. I think it's really each in their own time. Just keep keepin' on!

Spencer Family said...

Wait. I started training my son a month or two before his third birthday and it started out great and then he lost interest. So we stopped. Then about a month after he turned three we tried again and this time he caught on so quickly and he was potty trained in no time. Like others have said--sometimes its so much easier to keep them in diapers than getting to the back of the grocery store and having to race to the front before they have an accident. :)

Eli's Lids said...

I waited till Eli was ready and it happened within a week! Don't stress about it!
Cleaning up poop sucks.